ifyoucarryonthisway:

i need a job where i work one hour a week and i get paid a thousand dollars a minute 

dickromans:

IM REALLY UPSET ABOUT CREAMY MASHED POTATOES

asariboyfriend:

friend starts new bioware game

who are you gonna romance tell me this is the most important thing to know tell me the thing 

agender-unicorn:

gender: disobedient avocado 

luxgay:

she wears short skirts i wear your grandads clothes she’s cheer captain and i look incredible

(Source: ronaldreagay)

(Source: mercerism)

thoracs:

Shows up at starbucks 15 minutes late with starbucks but from a diffirent starbucks

deanon:

the profound things that happen when you leave writing tutors alone with magnetic words

theavengerscomics:

tony doesnt like to do things

-annoying:

i want an alarm clock that will blow up and kill me